How to Find a Music Mentor (Without Falling for the Hype)

The Mentorship Mirage

If you've been lurking around music spaces online lately, chances are you’ve seen the word “mentor” tossed around like free drink tokens at a networking mixer. It’s everywhere—on Instagram bios, email funnels, and websites promising to unlock your potential in three easy steps.

But here’s the thing no one wants to say out loud: mentorship has become a buzzword. And in too many cases, a cleverly disguised hustle. For artists—especially those of us navigating this thing independently—the stakes are too high to fall for sleek branding over substance.

So how do you really find a music mentor who’s worth their weight in wisdom?

Let’s unpack.

What Mentorship Isn't

Mentorship isn't someone spoon-feeding you cookie-cutter strategies.
It’s not a glorified accountability buddy who read “The War of Art” once and now charges $5k for pep talks.
And it’s definitely not someone who's never released a track but has a Canva-made funnel called “Artist Accelerator” with 100% ROI promises.

Real mentorship runs deeper. It’s relational, nuanced, and dare I say, spiritual. It invites you into your own becoming, not just your next campaign.

1. Why Depth Matters (And How to Spot It)

In an era obsessed with surface-level results, depth is the rebel.

A proper mentor doesn’t just help you launch a promo campaign—they help you understand why you’re making music at all. They challenge you to refine your voice, not just your content calendar.

And here’s the kicker: many so-called “mentors” aren’t trained to go that deep. Some lack real academic training in crucial areas like pedagogy, psychology, or even the actual music itself.

That doesn’t make them evil—but it does mean they might not be equipped to guide you through the complexities of artistic growth, well-being, or building a sustainable career.

Research backs this up. A study published in the Journal of Vocational Behavior (Allen et al., 2004) found that mentorship is most effective when it combines both psychosocial support and career development—something untrained mentors often miss.

In my Complete Independent Artist Roadmap (C.I.A.R.) course, we dive into these layers—craft, mindset, industry, and inner alignment—because artists don’t grow in silos. You grow as a whole person.

2. Look for a Practising Artist, Not Just a Consultant

One of the most overlooked factors in choosing a mentor?

Whether they’re still in the trenches.

The artist’s journey isn’t just a business model—it’s a living practice. Working with someone who still writes, performs, records, or experiments creatively means they get it.

They understand that “success” looks different when you’re building something meaningful rather than marketable.

Too many coaches, agencies, and industry players offer “mentorship” while having no direct experience with what it feels like to finish a song that doesn’t get picked up—or to perform for seven people in a room that echoes. Dealing with self-doubt that’s not just about generic paradigms of self-help but have roots in a struggle involving deeply sensitive and empathetic psyches that were not inherently built to be part of an ‘industry’ in the first place.

Their advice can not just sound tone-deaf but often really is–because, frankly, they’re working from another lens altogether.

In my coaching sessions, we often sit with these uncomfortable truths—because that's where transformation happens. Not in hype, but in honesty.

3. The ROI Is in the Long Game

Mentorship isn’t a shortcut. It’s a slow burn.
The real ROI? Clarity. Confidence. Craft. And yes, eventually, career growth—but rooted in something very different to what generic business advice will point you towards.

Being you. And expressing the same on your own terms.

Unfortunately, we live in a world wired for instant gratification. Some mentors tap into that by selling quick wins: follower growth, playlist adds, or viral hacks. But this often comes at the expense of sustainable, soulful development.

A 2022 review in Psychology of Aesthetics, Creativity, and the Arts (Kaufman & Beghetto) showed that long-term creative fulfillment correlates more with intrinsic motivation and support than with external rewards.

So when choosing a mentor, ask:

Will this person help me grow, or just help me grow faster?

Because the fastest route isn’t always the right one.

4. Discernment > Hype: How to Vet a Potential Mentor

Here’s a mini checklist to keep handy:

Do they have real-world experience as an artist? Not just as a coach or marketer.
Academic Credentials: I realise academia has seen better days as far as its positioning is concerned, but there is a certain thoroughness the training will give to those who have gone through the rites of their passage that does not necessarily get substituted by ‘street cred’ by default.
Street Cred: Speaking of, the immediate polar opposite to that is the mad professor lost outside the walls of their echo chambers, which can be as bad. Ideally, work with someone who can hold their ground both inside and out. I can confirm after working with the likes of Dr. John Matthias, Kenny Werner, and Gary Barone (excuse the name-dropping, but I am proud to have had these men as some of my mentors) that the results are life-changing.
Are they certified or trained in mentorship, education, or a relevant psychological framework? My friend and esteemed colleague Vivienne Aerts, or legendary artist and author Sheila Chandra, are pioneering examples of how inter-disciplinary knowledge can empower you in ways you didn’t even think possible.
Do they talk more about numbers or nuance? This is big: you are not a mere metric. And neither is your art!
Can they hold space for your vulnerability? Or do they rush you toward a goal post? Art is inherently non-linear. Conforming only to archaic, masculine, rational approaches with a primarily product-based lens is not something that is equipped to fulfill you long-term as an artist.
Do they speak to your soul as much as your strategy? This might not resonate with all belief systems. But I believe art is the language of our souls. Beyond cultural idiosyncrasies and/or sociopolitical factors (not to imply that either are irrelevant).

If your gut says something’s off, listen. Your intuition is an underrated compass in the business of being an artist.

5. A Word on Integrity and Value

I’ll be real with you—I’ve met incredible artists who’ve been burned by “mentors” promising the world, only to be left broke, confused, and creatively blocked. Yours truly included.

That’s not what mentorship should feel like.

One of my priorities when I started the Holistic Musician Academy, was that every layer of mentorship offered—whether it’s 1:1 sessions or a self-paced course—is rooted in lived experience, somewhat academic grounding, and an understanding of the emotional terrain of being an artist timelessly.

Integrity is timeless. No industry trend will change that. Influence, inform, yes. But it’s the one thing nobody gets to take away from us. And the one thing we do have complete agency over.

That POV is not for everyone. And probably not designed to sell out stadiums in six months. But it is for the ones who know that the real journey is inward as much as outward. Inside-out and not the other way round.

Final Thoughts: Mentorship Is Sacred, Not Slick

If you’re seeking a mentor, know this: you’re not weak. You’re wise.
You’re not lost. You’re ready.

But choose wisely.

The right mentor won’t turn you into a copy of themselves.
They’ll turn a mirror toward you—and wait while you remember who you are.

Help you be you.

Some Action Steps:

Audit your needs. What are you looking for: craft, mindset, industry guidance, or emotional support?
Research the mentor’s background. Are they actively practising? Qualified? Aligned with your values?
Watch out for red flags. Generic strategies, high-pressure sales tactics, or a lack of transparency = 🚩.
Start small. Explore free content, webinars, or lower-ticket courses like my $17 self-paced C.I.A.R. course to see if our values align.
Ask the hard questions. How do they define success? What does mentorship mean to them? What frameworks do they use?

Remember, your journey deserves depth.
And depth is not a trend—it’s a timeless, sacred space to nurture.

References:

Allen, T. D., Eby, L. T., Poteet, M. L., Lentz, E., & Lima, L. (2004). Career benefits associated with mentoring for protégés: A meta-analysis. Journal of Vocational Behavior, 65(3), 469–483.
Kaufman, J. C., & Beghetto, R. A. (2022). Beyond big-C and little-c: The four C model of creativity. Psychology of Aesthetics, Creativity, and the Arts.